Time Is One I Have No Control Over

Why is it so easy to write when I'm sad? Why can't I express my happiness but just have words flow when the tears do? Why can't I say all the things I need to say? Instead I just push them aside and put a smile on my face. Sure, I'm happy. Sure, I'm actually content. I'm okay with the choice you've made. I'm living with it and it's not hurting like it was...but the truth is, there is so much I wish I could say. I just can't right now. The things I feel inside are not feelings for someone who is just a friend. They aren't even for someone who needs a break. They're for someone that I love so much. Not just a fairytale romance, or a teen girl crush. But this deep and undying and undeniable love for another human being. One that cannot simply step to the side. It's like my whole heart goes out for you. I want nothing but your happiness. I want nothing but to be by your side. I had no idea something this deep could be true, that I could feel this way about someone. But I do...and all I can say is I Love You Too...